Sunday, December 16, 2007

Mommy Envy

I recently received an email from a fellow mommy whom I like and genuinely admire. For the sake of her anonymity, I won't go into the particulars about her except to say that she and her husband are dedicated, loving parents who make their children their number one priority. In the e-mail, mommy X expressed that she felt just a small pang of envy about one of McKenna's accomplishments. She has a daughter close to McKenna's age and both girls have experienced some similar milestone challenges.

This mommy felt like a creep. In my own excitement to share a big McKenna achievement, I made another mom feel not-so-great. And I hate that--especially when my friend pours her heart and soul into being a really good parent. Not to mention the fact that her daughter, despite some issues, is doing really well and is a shining little star in her own right.

I hope I don't give the impression that I blog to show-off. I wonder if I ought to write more about the tantrums, the back talk, the frustration. Maybe a few pics of my two darlings in a hair raising screaming match are in order. Because I don't want this to be anything like the photo albums of our parents and grandparents generations. You know the ones--where image after image reflects the way our parents wanted life to be remembered versus the way it really was. Snapshots of children in rows, in front of fireplaces, saying cheese in their Sunday best. It was the way everyone preserved memories in those days. I'm just opting for something a little more evolved. And hopefully Ethan and McKenna's tools and methods for recording their children's histories will be even more amazing.

So, without airing every bit of childhood laundry, I'll try to throw in the not-so-good with the great a little more often. Because raising children, while the best job in the world, is filled with more ups and downs than I can shake a stick at. And we mommies, well, we're in this thing together. We should be anyway.

By the way mommy X. Your little girl is doing great. The other kidlet too for that matter. And I marvel at your perseverance and dedication. I learn from you every time we're together.

1 comment:

Oracle said...

Personally, I like taking pictures of my kids when they are in total meltdown. First, they are funny pictures. Second, I want my kids to see what they look like having a fit and to know they were not total angels as children. Plus, nothing ticks them off more than having me snap a picture while they are wailing. I don't do it every time, but I have a few memorable ones. On the day Mimi was baptised, Tim missed it. He spent the entire time in total meltdown outside the church. That was after he threw himself onto the floor in front of the altar at church kicking, screaming and wailing. I made sure we took pictures. Evidence. Even an hour later when we took family pictures, he was still grumpy looking. It is funny now, but at the time, I wanted to throttle him.
What a time to throw a fit. Just perfect....